I See Paris, I see France…

Here’s a fun flashback from 2007 when I first moved back to NYC from Taiwan!

bra shopping in Macy's NYC

When it comes to bra shopping, I’m like a man: I try to get it done as quickly as possible and I do it once a year. My 300 NT ($9 USD) bras I bought in Taiwan were wearing thin so today I ventured over to Macy’s.

1hr and 1/2 later and $130 in the red, I walked out of Macy’s with a bag-o-brassieres. Suddenly the alarm sounded and a securty guad yelled to get my attention:

“Miss! Please come back–I have to check your bag!” said Simpson, the guard.

Annoyed, I walked back through the doors. Great, I thought to myself, I just want to get out of this store and now I look like I stole something!

Simpson gingerly pulled out all my bras and put them on a glass display case of watches. I tried to act nonchalent as he searched each lacey apparel but I was actually a little embarrassed. Finally he found the security tag that the saleswoman upstairs failed to remove. Of course, it was the sexiest pair I had bought and it was on display for the world to see.

“Do you have a receipt miss?” Simpson asked, trying to act as professional as he could.


As I pulled it out, another girl set off the security alarm and the guard called after her. He started going through her bag and then turned to me and said,”I don’t have the right tag remover for your bra, so I have to call someone to help. Just wait please.”

Wonderful! Now my bra gets to lay out in the open even longer. After Simpson removed the tag on that girl’s purchase (these salespeople are real slack!), he called someone on the phone.

Feeling awkward, I drew attention away from my bra by explaning to Simpson that I was at the checkout counter upstairs for a long time because they ran out of receipt paper (thus, I was having a fun-filled morning being held hostage at Macy’s).

Finally another male guard briskly walked towards us and yelled, “Here, give it to me!” He held out his hand and Simpson handed over my bra like it was a baton in a relay race. A minute later he ran back, smiling, with my popular purchase of the day.

“Thanks,” I muttered as he dropped it back in to my plastic bag.

Simpson turned to me and said,”Sorry that took so long. There is supposed to be a newer machine over here too.” It looked like Simpson, who was a rather nice guy, wanted to chat me up more and maybe even ask me for my number, but there was no need for all that–he had already gotten to second base and I was not interested.

(photo taken by Flickr’s Aschaefer)

7 responses to “I See Paris, I see France…

  1. Sheesh, I have daughters that are 13-years old and 10-years old. I sho’ hope that their mother handles all this bra purchasing stuff. How many bras does $130 buy you anyhow?peace, Villager

  2. I will be standing there feeling embarrassed & annoyed at the same time. So the moral of the story is ‘don’t wear bra’….just kidding. Thanks for sharing your story šŸ™‚

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